Never Fail

“…though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again…” Proverbs 24:16a (NIV)

I’m not afraid to fail. This has always been one of my stronger attributes. I don’t consider it a total defeat when I blow it; I just see it as another personal setback to yet another goal to conquer.

Sure, I’m not saying I can’t be hard on myself. I’m a perfectionist. I have disappointments just like the next person. Like the other day, when I disappointed my children, got impatient with my husband and spoke harshly to one of my kids. Soon after, my internal dialogue (you know that voice in your head that won’t let you off the hook) started reminding me of how badly I’d acted and how far I’d fallen short that day.

When I allow my mistakes, sins or broken relationships to convince me that I might as well give up is when defeat comes knocking on the door. You can’t let it. You have to shut the door.

Perhaps you have allowed failure to knock you down, tie you up with the ropes of regret and hold you hostage. You don’t have to. Sometimes you just have to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and keep trudging forward. It’s hard and the waters get muddy. We trip and fall. We just can’t let it keep us down.

It’s been stated that our past failures, and our fear of failing again, are two of the most common things that make us doubt ourselves.

But today’s verse shows us that it’s not supposed to be this way. Proverbs 24:16 has helped me recently to release the regret, guilt, fear and shame that have weighed me down and held me back.

When you find yourself feeling as if you have failed and you rise again, getting up can can actually help you become the confident woman God created you to be. It makes you feel stronger and better than you did before. Sometimes that feeling of failure or failing might even be the thing that stretched us to do more than we think we can. It may even be the nudge to have pushed us to try other methods of doing things when one way didn’t work. Maybe to even try harder.

Yep, I know, failure can be hurtful, but I think that it can also be beneficial.

Failure produces wisdom when we ask for it, maturity, and growth when we learn from it.

Avoiding failures and being perfect is not what God intended for us. He wants us to be able to accept and embrace our weaknesses. To grow in His love.

The truth is, we will sometimes fail to be who we want to be. But we will get closer to who we are meant to be every time we fall or fail and then choose to take God’s hand so we can get up again!Dear Lord, I’m so very thankful for Your loving grace. It reminds me that there is no condemnation for those who live in Christ Jesus. Even though I still may fall and fail through the course of my life I still can delight in you Lord. Today, I want to take Your hand and trust Your heart as You pull me back up again. I want to use my failures to help me become the confident woman You created me to be. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

De-Stressed

Stress

“Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you.” 2 Thessalonians 3:16 (NIV)

There are often times where I wonder and even ponder the question, “Does Jesus know what it’s like to be stressed?”

Well it wasn’t too terribly long ago that I got desperate enough to ask Him that question. I mean the kind of down on my knees desperate.

For years, I thought the Bible was not the place to go to for handling stress, much less a place to look for stress management tips and techniques. The word “stress” is just not a commonly used biblical term. You just don’t open the Bible up and bam see the word stress written out anywhere in there. What you see instead are a number of other adjectives being used like anxiety, worry, trouble, fear, burdens, anguish, dismay, trials, and adversity, just to name a few of the more common ones.

What you read about is the heartache of worries, frustrations and betrayals; about the sadness of deceit, the pull of temptation, and the devastation of sin. He spoke of all the difficult circumstances and situations that were going on in politics, churches, marriages, families, parenting, the communities and the world as a whole during those times in which he lived.

Despite the differences between now and then, stress is still the same and our need for Jesus is the same. Jesus knew and completely understood what we would be facing in our lifetime. He promised us the peace we would need in our busy and chaotic world in order to live in despite its misery.

Quite often we encounter and endure stressful circumstances in our lives. The Bible continuously teaches us how to celebrate and enjoy our life regardless of its demise. It teaches us how to not only survive the storms of life, but stay afloat in the midst of them. It teaches us how to find joy in our life despite its circumstances. How to overcome its stress, despite the constant balancing acts we perform. From the very beginning of the Bible in the book of Genesis to the end in the book of Revelation, we can discover an infinite number of suggestions for stress relief if we take the time to read and study.

For example, 2 Thessalonians 3:16 encourages us that Jesus Himself provided a solution to stress. Peace is only available in and through Him.

Stress is not a sign of the times by which we live; it’s a sign of living the life we live. Always has been, and always will be. Jesus may have had different stressors than what we have today, but the overall power by which it holds on our hearts is still the same.

There are many ways to reduce and manage the stress in our daily lives. It can be in the form of massages, vacations, relaxation techniques, shopping, and soft music or bubble baths. Maybe it was through the use of drugs or alcohol at one time for you. Maybe you have tried DBT and CBT training, yoga, pilates… Perhaps you’ve tried everything known to man and nothing has worked for you.

Sometimes you end up getting to the end of the rope and you have to find your Higher Power. For me Jesus was at the end of the line and I had to grab the last knot. His methods have withstood the test of time, used by generation after generation for thousands of years.Prayer. Dear Lord, When I know I am drowning in stress and I have tried everything to relieve it — except for You. Please forgive me when I’m not trusting You enough to believe that You offer the peace I am searching for. Today, I invite You into my grim circumstances, and back into my life, and ask You to open my eyes to see the real truth and stress relief that my heart is aching for. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Not Built for Guilt

Not that I have now attained, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to lay hold of and make my own, that for which Christ Jesus has laid hold of me and made me His own. Philippians 3:12

All of us have had times and moments in our lives that we are just not proud of. Not because we have bipolar but because we are human. Just a simple known fact, we as humans are going to make mistakes every day of our lives. Some of these may be simple, tiny mistakes and yet others may be on the other end of the spectrum. Those of us with bipolar tend to have a wider range and sometimes more drastic at times. Also, they are a little more difficult to bounce back from but they are still simple, ordinary mistakes just like everybody else’s.

We are not built for guilt. Our future has no room for the past. God did not intend for us to be loaded down with guilt. This is why He sent Jesus to redeem us from guilt. This doesn’t mean we go out and keep doing everything over and over again. It doesn’t mean we will never sin, it means that when we do, we can admit it, receive forgiveness, and be free from guilt. This is a progressive journey to be right with God. We have to drag that guilt right along with us down that path in order to make progress toward freedom and joy.

If you are spending too much time worrying about your past then you are doing what God has told us not to do. Not to dwell on the past. Nobody is perfect. What’s good about all of this is Jesus came for those who were sick, not for just those who were well. Imperfect or perfect. God will convict us of what we did wrong but never make us feel guilty for our mistakes. Godly conviction brings opportunity to change and progress. To live for the future not in our past.

Dear Lord, please heal my heart and help me to release the guilt and shame of my past sins into Your hands. Please give me the strength to stop condemning myself, and instead bask in the glory of Your forgiveness and mercy. With you, I can be a new creature. Thank you for sending Your son to pay the penalty for me, so that I can spend eternity with you. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Sidestepping Change

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2

Things changing in my life used to bring on such a feeling of dread. As old patterns were jeopardized I would be filled with uncertainty and insecurity. I now meet new changes with a sense of challenge. I find them exciting and invigorating. Without these changes my life would remain dull, lifeless, and uninteresting if I never tried any new way of doing things or accepted new challenges. When you step out in faith to do and be more you allow yourself to grow by leaps and bounds. Sometimes I’m not always able to meet these new challenges but this is all a part of life and a way of trying new things. There’s a sense of joy that comes with knowing there will always be new challenges to head off in life. It’s nice to know I can learn, experience and feel new things in life each and every day!

Prayer – Dear Heavenly Father, I know that life is for living and growing through so many new experiences that we can meet each day. These come to us no matter what age we are. I know that You are with me through each of these changes as I grow in them. I thank you in advance for being able to expect and accept each new challenge. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Hope Chest

“Lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal.” Matthew 6:20

I was looking at the different furniture items in my house lately and realized I had quite a few dated pieces. A very nice oak bedroom suit from when I got married, another in my son’s room and yet another in my daughter’s and then I came across one piece of furniture that brought back many memories that was really dated. Did you ever have a hope chest when you were a teenager? Well, my daughter now has mine!

Back then treasures were stored for items you hoped to use when you got married. It seemed all my friends had on. We all had them full of fun items and were always buying neat things for them. We would even save clippings from magazines of what we “hoped” for in the future since obviously there were some things we just could not afford or even fit in the chest. Now they are used for more practical storage items it seems. My daughter uses it to keep all her baby dolls in and blankets.

When you think about storing all these treasures, in a way, heaven is like a hope chest. For we can lay aside many treasures there that can be locked away and not destroyed. Let me ask you a question, is your treasure being prepared in heaven?

Lonely but Lifted Up

“Turn to me and show me your favor, I am lonely and hurting.” Psalm 25:16 (NIRV)

Most of us, if not all of us, have gone through periods of loneliness in our lives.
I think living with loneliness is the hardest part of having bipolar. God made us to be social creatures. Not only were we designed to have a relationship with Him, but with others as well. When we are lacking those relationships, we feel the loss deeply.

I believe God definitely speaks to us in our loneliness. And I think that perhaps there are times when God allows loneliness into our lives as an invitation to pursue Him to be one of our closest friends. When our friends have left us, or we have left them, God can reveal His presence in new ways.

Bipolar takes away your identity. It digs into the deepest core of your being and it replaces everything you have inside of you with something entirely different. Something that you can’t recognize anymore. My Bipolar went untreated for many years. Every time I looked in the mirror I wasn’t sure who this person was looking back at me. Today I look back at this reflection and see an entirely new person for which I stand in this whole new light. Not only did Bipolar rob me of my sanity, but it robbed me of my ability to see beyond and around the space it confined and dictated me to look. I didn’t realize it at the time but I could no longer tell reality from fantasy. I essentially walked in a world no longer my own. A lonely world by myself.

Bipolar distorts your moods and thoughts. Your behaviors become irrational. It destroys the basis of rational thoughts. Way too often it even erodes your desire and will to live. It is an illness that is biological. It is a brain disease. But one where one feels psychological experiences. There are many advantages of pleasure yet we endure suffering more often than not that has to led many unfortunately to suicide.

Simple loneliness seems the culprit– but sometimes so strong that it leaves us feeling discarded and like you are stuck being a visitor in your own life.

To a certain degree the loneliness is given birth by another of the most common consequences of bipolar disorder– fear. People with bipolar learn very quickly to fear what happens when other people find out. They learn what it means for others to assume you have no judgement, no character, no self control and are worthy of little or no trust. They learn that just the word bipolar scares other people and makes them wonder what you are going to do to them. They learn that when other people find out they have bipolar they automatically assume they are nothing else other than bipolar.

Having bipolar there is one thing that you need more than anything else in this world and that is not to be alone. However hard it is and difficult it is, being alone is worse for recovery. Recovery does not occur in a vacuum. But to so many people with bipolar they learn that survival depends on being alone. At minimum we learn the necessity of personal vigilance.

We are surrounded by frustrations daily and one of those is that very liquid we need for survival in life and yet we are are told by life that it is too dangerous to drink. We find ourselves dying of thirst in a land where it seems like everyone else’s glass is full. Where ours remains half empty or even worse empty.

We so very often give up on people. We find ourselves trying to learn the proper social dance to insure survival the best we can, but find life shaded by the sadness of knowing that openness brings only disappointment and pain.

Stigma is a real thing in this world today. It is a primary source of the failure of our mental health system. People do not want to be part of something that they think they will be a result of being labeled “just another crazy.” Almost every person I know and I’ve met who has struggled with an emotional illness has also struggled with a sense of personal shame at what they have done or who they feel they have become. An integral part of recovery is learning to accept who we are and who we have become. We should be proud of who we are.

The environment that surrounds us which however unwittingly or accidentally confirms that sense of personal shame is experienced as cruel and unusual punishment. For us it really leaves us wondering if loneliness is all we can look forward to and trying to accept it as the least of bad options.

Somehow we must face our insecurities and find the willpower to reach out and above and beyond our inner circle to those around us that can and will offer help. As King Solomon once said,

“9 Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
(Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)

Loneliness can break us and defeat us in our recovery. We need to prepare our hearts to accept love, support, and friendship as we go. It’s difficult as we’ve all been trampled upon and our hearts are fragile. We have to remember the third strand as being God and His hand is never broken in this life. We must never let go, we must move forward…

Prayer – Dear Heavenly Father, all of the strength that I need is in your hands.
I am not asking, Lord, that you take this trial away from me right now. Instead, I simply ask that Your will be done in my life. Whatever that means, that is what I want.

But I admit that it’s hard, Lord.

Sometimes I feel like I can’t go on. The pain and the fear are too much for me, and I know that I don’t have the strength on my own to get through this trial that I am facing right now.

I know that I can come to you, Jesus, and that you will hear my prayer. I know that it is not your intent to bring me to this point just to leave me in the wilderness alone. And leave me hanging by a thin piece of thread.

Please, Lord, give me the strength that I need to face today. I don’t have to worry about tomorrow.

If you just give me the strength that I need today that is all I need.

Please God keep me from sinning during this trial. Instead, help me to keep my eyes on you.

Thank you for hearing my prayer.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Let us give up our worries…

“Blessed are those who keep His testimonies, who seek Him with the whole heart!”
Psalm 119:2

There are just some things in life that I do daily that I wish would just stay done. Some things that I wouldn’t have to keep doing over and over again and again. The monotony of the tasks is just tedious. For example, washing dishes when you’re only going to use them for the next meal. Laundering the same clothes over and over again. Re-vacuuming the floors. We re-mow the lawn every week; sometimes twice! What about reapplying lipstick! The list just goes on. I know, sounds pretty lazy. But sometimes I get bored of doing the same ole thing over and over and it would just be nice to see these things stay done for once in my life!

I guess my spiritual life requires this same kind of maintenance. I have to read scriptures over and over again to really understand them and apply them in my life. I must confess all my sins to God daily. As I’m certainly not perfect. Just when I think I’ve given my problems and cares over to God I find there’s more that sneak back into my life and I need Him again. So, the cycle in essence continues. It’s just part of being human. Dealing with the many fear and frustrations that come our way is part of life and is going to happen more than once. We may not always win the first time around and we may not get it right but we can’t let it defeat us. We have to deal with our heart and not let our worries continue to take hold of us again and again.

Prayer- Dear Lord, when my concerns consume me, help me remember You are there inviting me to come to You and talk about all I’m thinking and doing. Show me if my workload or my worries are making me weary and help me trust You with both. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Some Kind of Wonderful

In the Bible,
Psalms 107:8 says: “Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!”

Romans 5:3-4 it says: “We rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

I know the title brings you a question mark right? Well, I want to change things up a bit a give a new swing on things. We hear such comments about the ugly of having bipolar, but not many of us speak of the good side of things very often. I thought I would reflect on a little of both, more so on the latter!

But I bet you’re you’re wondering how I can possibly write about the good things of having bipolar, huh? I think trying to be grateful in spite of an illness can sometimes be very difficult. I talk honestly and openly about my experiences with Bipolar, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Sjogren’s . I speak and write about these as very real chronic invisible illnesses through the lens of someone who personally lives the symptoms daily. My desire is to spread the message that hope is always real, despite living in a world that is often very harsh.

Everything is not always gloomy. However, I think it’s important to acknowledge the good that comes from the bad. I’d like to get two very real and important troublesome experiences out of the way before I speak of the good as it has been these that push me to seek the positive more and more each day.

First, the hardest thing about my illness is the unknown. Not knowing when my next flare up will be from the Sjogren’s and spine issues. Then there’s the stability of not not knowing my moods day in and day out. Of being able to gauge how long the stability or I guess I would like to say remission will last from the bipolar.

Secondly, there’s a secret that I would be hiding if I didn’t share it with you. There’s one thing that really irritates me and that’s when people try and tell me,”Oh, I know exactly how you feel?” or “I know what you have been or are going through?” No, you do not!!! And the old cliche that everyone likes to throw around haphazardly, “Oh, I’m so depressed!!!! No, I can guarantee you’re not!

There’s a medial term called anhedonia that is associated with Bipolar. Many of us with bipolar suffer from this and it is a term that others simply do not know about and don’t understand. It is an inability to feel pleasure. A complete inability to feel pleasure in the activity or whatever is occurring at that given moment. No matter what I do, no matter how much I may have liked something in the past, no matter how much theoretical pleasure I should be deriving from this by which I’m doing, seeing, seeking; I do not feel any pleasure or happiness whatsoever. This can go on for days, weeks, months!

It’s not about being, just sad or depressed, or as most would like to think, “being made up.” I have to fight hard to find the good out of the bad of this. When I experience this there is literally no feeling whatsoever. So, trying to find pleasure or the good out of everything is extremely difficult. It sounds so easy for me to sit here and write about all the good of bipolar but the one thing that is definitely not is the anhedonia. This is if you have this as part of your diagnosis as not every person with bipolar has this.

Then there’s the thing about feeling depressed, that term that folks like to throw around so loosely? Well, depression is real and is a very serious sometimes life threatening illness and can prevent others from getting help when others do not take it seriously. People can’t just, “get over it”? or “snap out of it”? or “stop being so selfish”? Just as you can’t “get over” cancer, or “snap out of” a heart attack, most people cannot overcome depression without medical and/or psychological help. To walk in the depths of darkness of this illness is horrendous!

Depression is very real and it is extremely painful to live through. But there is help and hope — in most cases, under the proper medical care with the proper doctors and treatment regimen, depression can be treated and managed effectively to allow a person to enjoy a rich and fulfilling life. Don’t suffer in silence or let someone you love suffer needlessly! Ask for the help!

Let us please be careful the next time we casually throw around the phrase, “I’m so depressed…” none of us would like to walk around casually and haphazardly throwing around things like “I feel like I have diabetes or cancer today,” — it would most likely offend our sensibilities. It would dismiss the real pain and suffering of what these folks are going through. More people would get the help they really need if they were treated with the respect they warrant.

Now that this is out of the way I can feel good about talking about the good things in my life. We have the good days with the bad just as everyone else does. Well, if you are sitting where I am it sometimes seems like it is absolutely nothing when you’re in the depths of the depression or spinning around in a manic phase at the time that’s for definite! But I’ve sat back and have had to look at both sides of my story and take the good from it because there is some good benefits from having an illness, including the mental illness. I’ve taken the time to find that in my life with all of my invisible illness and my life with Bipolar.

Anxiety and depression gives me the ability to empathize and have compassion for other people. I’m able to know how to respond to others going through similar situations as I know firsthand what it feels like to be in the depths of misery or the plight of mania. I have to add every person’s experience is different with their own unique story but we can relate to each other and value each other in our own individuality.

I’ve learned how to say no. This is something that comes very hard for me. I’m still working tremendously on this, but I’ve definitely come a long way because I have to. I found that during my life if you are very good at something that you do, like your career, for example, then people will tend to ask you to do more.

Anyway, you will find that you end up spending more and more energy doing more for them than for yourself. You never have learned to say no for many reasons. Now, it’s much simpler when you can just use bipolar as an excuse and just say no you can’t. Now I don’t mean come out and tell someone this. I mean having bipolar should begin to help you realize how to set priorities and limitations in your life. This in the long run is best for your overall health!

My marriage is much stronger today than it ever has been in the 25 years we have been married. It seems likely that 90% of marriages where one partner has bipolar end in divorce. I think that’s just tragic and truly sad. I can say with true honesty that my husband has had so many reasons to leave me during my illness on numerous occasions but he has chosen to stay even though he didn’t understand what was wrong with me. We didn’t even know that what I was having was an illness until 24 years into our marriage! His perseverance has been a blessing to our marriage. We both are willing to educate ourselves and roll with the punches daily. We both work together now to make sure this illness doesn’t win over our lives!

I now have far better and greater relationships with my children. My time with them is invaluable now. Before I didn’t know how to identify my illness and its triggers. Learning that I have bipolar has been a good wake-up call. I now spend more time on things that are important to me. We now spend more quality time together. They now know how to identify triggers and also help during any cycling if ever it happens. We all work together.

I’ve slowed down a lot and manage my time more wisely than ever before. I’ve even stopped wearing a watch. This being something I definitely haven’t missed. Losing track of time rarely causes problems and if it does, so what, life still continues!

I take my physical health much more seriously than I used to. I’m still frustrated by my lack of action on exercise, but I’m thinking about physical health every day, even when its hard to follow through with action. I watch my eating, my sleep schedule, my medications right down to vitamins and any over the counter medications or supplements.

I’ve learned to be thankful for what I have and not yearn for what I don’t.
The best thing must be the ability to empathize with others who are facing the same problems.

I was once very guarded with what I said, often checking myself from saying anything that could offend or impact a person’s view of me. I’ve really lightened up and feel liberated. I’m rarely inappropriate (except when ill), but even if I am, I sense that nobody really cares anymore. I’m able to recognize at the onset and control things sooner. LOL

Being engaged with the world is good. I think more deeply about things like inequality, poverty, the environment and mental illness. (The downside of course is feeling let down by those in positions of power who continually fail us.)

Life is absurd. My life is absurd. I’ve learned to laugh at both. I keep a smile on and keep on going. I try to make light of things when I can.

I definitely don’t have it all together. I still have episodes now and then – although less severe – in both directions. I didn’t write this post to give a different impression, but just to put some ideas out there for looking at illness from a different angle.

A Quote that I enjoy that I would like to share that was given to me from a friend when I was hospitalized : “To be grateful for the good things that happen in our life is easy, but to be grateful for all of our lives—the good as well as the bad, the moments of joy as much as the moments of sorrow, the successes as well as the failures, the rewards as well as the rejections—that requires hard spiritual work.

Still, we are only grateful people when we can say thank you to all that has brought us to the present moment. As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for.

Do not be afraid to look at everything that has brought you to where you are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God.”

-Henri Nouwen, “Bread for the Journey”

Prayer-“Dear Heavenly Father, may I be humbly grateful for the whole of my life. In every moment that shapes who I am, let me remember the Spirit of Christ as my center.”

20/20

“The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7

One of the things I have noticed as you top the hill at age 40 is your vision just ever so slightly starts to decline. I don’t mean to where you have to get regular glasses. I mean the glasses where when you have started reading and your arms are no longer long- enough-to-be-able-to-reach-out-far-enough for you to be able to see kind of glasses. Those reading glasses! I laughed at my husband when he reached the age of having to get them and karma struck.

So, I’m beginning to be able to see more clearly now. Even though my eyesight has par taken me, my spiritual sight has been getting better. Everything is making more sense to me now. To have God’s peace I don’t necessarily have to understand everything. In Philippians 4:7 it says, “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” I think this is the kind of peace spoken in this verse. A peace that transcends all understanding.

There are some intense hardships and extenuating circumstances in my life recently that God has used in my life to bring me this very peace. As I write, speak, His healing virtue pours through the very wounds of my soul. There are still holes within me now that God is still filling with his shining glory.

God uses us in all of our weaknesses while we use Him in His strength!

Prayer – Dear Heavenly Father, My desire is to have a deeper sense of Your peace in me today. Please take away all my fear, doubt, and concern from my heart and replace it with the peace that only You can give. Thank You that Your peace will guard my mind so that I will not give place to thoughts that are not beneficial to me. Thank You that Your peace will guard my heart from unproductive emotions and feelings that only serve to shatter my life. Thank You that the depths of Your peace are greater than we can imagine and that through this peace, we are made whole. In Jesus’ precious name. Amen.

We Live Life to its Fullest

“God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery…which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.” Colossians 1:27

I absolutely enjoy learning new things. You know why? Because every bit of the information gathered brings us through a new adventure. Also, because having bipolar doesn’t give me much of a choice. I have to stay on top of things. It opens doors to a whole new world and gives us a view in a radiantly painted perspective. I can inquire about so many more questions. It sparks my enthusiasm. Real lifelong, ongoing education doesn’t just answer questions it’s thought provoking. Meaningful education takes place when we have to think. This is when the fun of it all takes place! This is what life is all about. Give and take! Questions and answers! Much of scripture doesn’t tell us everything we need to know. It only provides us a chart for which to live our life to its fullest potential. Scripture remains a secret which allows us to remain dependent on God. This is fun in and of itself! In essence, if we live life to the fullest the fun really may never stop! One thing is for sure, having bipolar allows us to experience the full realm of life.